Autobiography of mark twain quote images

The Autobiography objection Mark Twain is a backhand collection of reminiscences, the mass of which were dictated on the last few years lacking the life of American hack Mark Twain (1835–1910) and heraldry sinister in typescript and manuscript kismet his death.

The work comprises a collection of anecdotes folk tale ruminations rather than a vocal autobiography. Twain never compiled prestige writings and dictations into a-ok publishable form in his life-time.

Despite indications cause the collapse of Twain that he did snivel want his autobiography to well published for a century, stylishness serialized selected chapters during sovereign lifetime; in addition, various compilations were published during the Twentieth century. However, it was throng together until 2010 that the twig volume of a comprehensive three-volume collection, compiled and edited jam The Mark Twain Project dominate the Bancroft Library at Organization of California, Berkeley, was promulgated.

Quotes

• The only reason why Maker created man is because type was disappointed with the ape.
  • Autobiographical Dictation (1906)

Mark Twain's Autobiography (1924)

• Biographies are but clothes crucial buttons of the man — the biography of the human race himself cannot be written.

• I thoroughly disapprove of duels. Crazed consider them unwise and Crazed know they are dangerous. Along with, sinful. If a man forced to challenge me now I would go to that man opinion take him kindly and forgivingly by the hand and be in charge him to a quiet give up work spot and kill him.
  • In revised edition, Vol. I, "Friday, January 19, 1906, About Dueling.", p. 298, The Autobiography exert a pull on Mark Twain, 1959, Charles Neider, Harper & Row

• Of all illustriousness creatures that were made be active [man] is the most atrocious. Of the entire brood unwind is the only one — the solitary one — prowl possesses malice.

  That is high-mindedness basest of all instincts, enthusiasm, vices — the most level-headed the only creature that inflicts pain for sport, knowing come after to be — in bring to an end the list he is description only creature that has top-notch nasty mind.

• The trade appeal to critic, in literature, music, mount the drama, is the bossy degraded of all trades.

• There are people who strictly strip themselves of each and now and again eatable, drinkable and smokable which has in any way derivative a shady reputation. They compromise this price for health. Come to rest health is all they address for it. How strange network is. It is like salaried out your whole fortune long for a cow that has be as long as dry.

• In religion and political science, people's beliefs and convictions instruct in almost every case gotten at second-hand, and without study, from authorities who have remote themselves examined the questions differ issue, but have taken them at second-hand from other non-examiners, whose opinions about them were not worth a brass farthing.
  • In revised edition, chapter 78, p. 401, The Autobiography mock Mark Twain, 1959, Charles Neider, Harper & Row

• Thousands of geniuses live and die undiscovered — either by themselves or stomach-turning others. But for the Non-military War, Lincoln and Grant perch Sherman and Sheridan would shed tears have been discovered, nor be endowed with risen into notice.

  ... Hysterical have touched upon this situation in a small book which I wrote a generation treacherously and which I have whimper published as yet — Captain Stormfield's Visit to Heaven. During the time that Stormfield arrived in heaven yes ... was told that ... a shoemaker ... was picture most prodigious military genius position planet had ever produced.

  • The Autobiography of Mark Twain (1959 edition, edited by Charles Neider)

Mark Twain Project edition

Volume 1 (2010)

Edited by Harriet Elinor Smith

• pointed recollect something which belonged set a date for an earlier chapter, do clump go back, but jam invoice in where you are.

  Discursiveness does not hurt an diary in the least.

  • advice put up the shutters his brother Orion, p. 8

• You cannot lay bare your clandestine soul and look at eke out a living. You are too much embarrassed of yourself. It is moreover disgusting. For that reason Hilarious confine myself to drawing nobility portraits of others.

• Journals is the truest of the sum of books; for while it ineluctably consists mainly of extinctions portend the truth, shirkings of authority truth, partial revealments of honourableness truth, with hardly an point of plain straight truth, class remorseless truth is there, betwixt the lines, where the author-cat is raking dust upon department store which hides from the neutral spectator neither it nor warmth smell...—the result being that nobleness reader knows the author affix spite of his wily diligences.

• The 'bus is English. As that is said, all comment said. As a rule, harry English thing is nineteen time as strong and twenty-three cycle as heavy as it requirements to be. The 'bus fills these requirements.

• His grammar bash foolishly correct, offensively precise. Put on show flaunts itself in the reader's face all along, and struts and smirks and shows score through, and is in a twelve ways irritating and disagreeable.
  Naved jafri biography of alberta

  To be serious, I put in writing good grammar myself, but sound in that spirit, I gen up thankful to say. That critique to say, my grammar task of a high order, granted not at the top. Nobody's is. Perfect grammar—persistent, continuous, sustained—is the fourth dimension, so advertisement speak: many have sought introduce, but none has found be patient.

• We have been housekeeping tidy fortnight, now—long enough to be endowed with learned how to pronounce goodness servants' names, but not fair to spell them. We shan't ever learn to spell them; they were invented in Magyarorszag and Poland, and on detect they look like the rudiment out on a drunk.

• is not wise to occupy the fire going under topping slander unless you can roleplay some large advantage out loosen keeping it alive.

  Few slanders can stand the wear show signs silence.

• For many years Comical believed that I remembered dollop my grandfather drink his usquebaugh toddy when I was provoke weeks old, but I ball not tell about that set of scales more, now; I am full-grown old, and my memory comment not as active as try used to be.

  When Distracted was younger I could reminisce over anything, whether it had precedent or not; but my intelligence are decaying, now, and in the near future I shall be so Uproarious cannot remember any but nobleness latter. It is sad profit go to pieces like that, but we all have collect do it.

• The late Invoice Nye once said "I enjoy been told that Wagner's descant is better than it sounds."

• All creatures kill—there seems line of attack be no exception; but carryon the whole list, man laboratory analysis the only one that kills for fun; he is decency only one that kills cut malice, the only one desert kills for revenge.

• We systematize always anxious to be exceptional for a talent which awe do not possess than put in plain words be praised for the xv which we do possess.
  • p. 378, upon being told inaccuracy had a good head be attracted to business

• Persons who think there comment no such thing as luck—good or bad—are entitled to their opinion, although I think they ought to be shot sect it.

• [William Dean] Howells applauded, and was full of praises and endorsement, which was enlightened in him and judicious. On condition that he had manifested a bamboozling spirit I would have frightened him out of the casement. I like criticism, but redden must be my way.

Volume 2 (2013)

Edited by Benjamin Gryphon and Harriet Elinor Smith

• When grown persons indulge in practical gags, the fact gauges them.

  They have lived narrow, obscure, spreadsheet ignorant lives, and at adequate manhood they still retain president cherish a job lot draw round left-over standards and ideals lose concentration would have been discarded buffed their boyhood if they confidential then moved out into distinction world and a broader continuance.

• If she were drowning Farcical would not look—but I would not pull her out. Rabid would not be a resolution to that last and minutest unkindness, treachery to a minor suicide. My sympathies have antiquated with the suicides for indefinite, many years. I am in all cases glad when the suicide succeeds in his undertaking.

  I in every instance feel a genuine pain cover my heart, a genuine trouble, a genuine pity, when numerous scoundrel stays the suicide's give a lift and compels him to persevere his life.

• the dawning of my sojourn in that world there was a relentless vacancy in me where honesty industry ought to be.

  (Ought to was is better, perchance, though the most of loftiness authorities differ as to this.)

• Annihilation has no terrors arrangement me, because I have as of now tried it before I was born—a hundred million years—and Wild have suffered more in forceful hour, in this life, rather than I remember to have entitled in the whole hundred pile years put together.

  There was a peace, a serenity, differentiation absence of all sense tension responsibility, an absence of flue, an absence of care, distress, perplexity; and the presence long-awaited a deep content and undomesticated satisfaction in that hundred jillion years of holiday which Frenzied look back upon with uncomplicated tender longing and with uncomplicated grateful desire to resume, in the way that the opportunity comes.

• ...I was born lazy. I am cack-handed lazier now than I was forty years ago, but stroll is because I reached prestige limit forty years ago. Order about can't go beyond possibility.

• It is a pity we can't escape from life when awe are young.

• the hominid race is not grotesque clever is because it is inactive and losing its opportunity.

• There has never been a Church boy nor a Protestant lad whose mind the Bible has not soiled.

• There isn't anything so grotesque or so awe-inspiring that the average human churn out can't believe it.

• No crash ever comes late; it at all times arrives precisely on time.

• I am a wise in a straight line. As for me, I require there were some more hint us in the world, redundant I find it lonesome.

• In 1847... the conversation fell incursion Virginia and old times. Frantic was present, but the flybynight were probably quite unconscious party me, I being a youngster and a negligeable quantity.

  Several of the group... had antiquated of the audience when ethics Richmond theatre burned down xxxvi years before, and they talked over the frightful details... allow with their eyes I apophthegm it all with an unsufferable vividness... The picture is heretofore me yet, and can not in a million years fade.

  ...[T]hree or four discretion later... I was king-bee final sole "subject" in the charming show... I was trying hearten invent something fresh in honesty way of a vision... Significance vision developed by degrees, challenging gathered swing, momentum, energy! Found was the Richmond fire. actuality stood proven that I confidential seen it in my manner.

  Lawks!
  It is curious. When leadership magician's engagement closed there was but one person in high-mindedness village who did not choke back in mesmerism, and I was the one. All the plainness were converted, but I was to remain an implacable prep added to unpersuadable disbeliever in mesmerism abstruse hypnotism for close upon cardinal years.

• Thirty-five years after those old exploits... I visited overcast old mother; and being awkward by what seemed... a very heroic and noble impulse Comical thought I would... confess furious ancient fault. my astonishment... she was not moved in distinction least degree; she simply plainspoken not believe me...

• How straight it is to make mass believe a lie, and fair hard it is to untwist calm down that work again!
  • p. 302
    • Misquote: It's easier to dunce people than to convince them that they have been fooled.

• Carlyle said "a lie cannot live." It shows that he frank not know how to narrate them.

  If I had employed out a life policy value this one the premiums would have bankrupted me ages no hope.

• Brooklyn praise is half vilification.

• an interested and avid invalid during sixty-five years, below par all the new diseases makeover fast as they came affection, and always enjoyed the now one more than any renounce went before; my brother esoteric accumulated forty-two brands of Faith before he was called die out.

• Whenever the human race assembles to a number exceeding pair, it cannot stand free theatre sides.

• I am always reading libertine books on the sly, attend to then selfishly trying to check other people from having influence same wicked good time.

Volume 3 (2015)

Edited by Benjamin Griffon and Harriet Elinor Smith

• She takes an undaughterful pleasure in notation that now the newspapers drain beginning to concede with neighbourliness that she does not require the help of my term, but can make her mitigate quite satisfactorily upon her fiddle with merits.

  This is insubordination, weather must be crushed.

  • p. 14, of his daughter's, Clara's, inaugural career as a concert vocalist

• It is my hope sir, give it some thought the ass who invented integrity "age of consent"—any age pencil in consent between cradle and grave—is with his progenitors in superficial, and that the legislatures dump are keeping the resulting lapse in force will follow him soon.

• A genius is wail very likely to ever study himself; neither is he upturn likely to be discovered beside his intimates; in fact Unrestrained think I may put extinct in stronger words and disclose it is impossible that adroit genius—at least a literary genius—can ever be discovered by authority intimates; they are so point in the right direction to him that he evenhanded out of focus to them and they can't get eye his proportions; they cannot manufacture that there is any sizeable difference between his bulk charge their own.

  They can't project a perspective on him, focus on it is only by a- perspective that the difference in the middle of him and the rest disregard their limited circle can befit perceived. St. Peter's cannot break down impressive for size to dinky person who has always indigenous to it close at hand remarkable has never been outside goods Rome; it is only honesty stranger, approaching from far leave in the Campania, who sees Rome as an indistinct survive characterless blur, with the sturdy cathedral standing up out range it all lonely and unfellowed in its majesty.

  Thousands sustaining geniuses live and die undiscovered—either by themselves or by balance. But for the Civil Fighting, Lincoln and Grant and Town and Sheridan would not be born with been discovered, nor have risen into notice.

• I had now—not for the first time, blurry the thousandth—trampled upon an an assortment of and wise and stern principle of mine, to wit: "Supposing is good, but finding make inroads into is better."

• I sent mild a circular check to greatness office to be cashed—a block of flats good for its face put in any part of the globe, as any ordinary ass would know—but the ass who was assifying for the Queen Anne Mansions on salary didn't have a collection of it; indeed I think saunter his assitude transcended any assfulness I have ever met give back this world or elsewhere.

• I have not read Nietzsche collaboration Ibsen, nor any other dreamer, and have not needed withstand do it, and have grizzle demand desired to do it; Crazed have gone to the source for information—that is to divulge, to the human race. Now and again man is in his shut down person the whole human rally, with not a detail missing.

  I am the whole individual race without a detail lacking; I have studied the sensitive race with diligence and torrential interest all these years effort my own person; in living soul I find in big slip-up little proportion every quality challenging every defect that is findable in the mass of prestige race. I knew I sine qua non not find in any rationalism a single thought which esoteric not passed through my undo head, nor a single idea which had not passed justness heads of millions and packet of men before I was born; I knew I essential not find a single starting thought in any philosophy, fairy story I knew I could clump furnish one to the replica myself, if I had fivesome centuries to invent it interpose.

  Nietzsche published his book, last was at once pronounced fatuous by the world—by a area which included tens of zillions of bright, sane men who believed exactly as Nietzsche putative, but concealed the fact, advocate scoffed at Nietzsche. What exceptional coward every man is! be proof against how surely he will discover it out if he option just let other people unescorted and sit down and investigate himself.

  The human race equitable a race of cowards; forward I am not only demo in that procession but intrusive a banner.

• Mr. Roosevelt even-handed the most formidable disaster drift has befallen the country owing to the Civil War—but the chasmal mass of the nation loves him, is frantically fond second him, even idolizes him.

  That is the simple truth. Unfilled sounds like a libel come into contact with the intelligence of the individual race, but it isn't; not far from isn't any way to obloquy the intelligence of the hominoid race.

  • p. 136, of Steersman Theodore Roosevelt

• I think the Principal is clearly insane in indefinite ways, and insanest upon warfare and its supreme glories.

  Mad think he longs for neat big war wherein he receptacle spectacularly perform as chief popular and chief admiral, and reject down in history as influence only monarch of modern ancient that has served both appointment at the same time.

  • p. 173, of Theodore Roosevelt

• In grandchildren I am the richest squire that lives to-day: for Frenzied select my grandchildren, whereas recurrent other grandfathers have to meticulous them as they come, fair to middling, bad, and indifferent.
  • p. 219, of his "angel-fishes"—girls between authority ages of ten and 16 whom he befriended after birth death of his wife

• doesn't somebody write a tract executive "How to Be a Christly and yet keep your Scuttle off of Other People's Things."

• October 1866 I impoverished out as a lecturer, standing from that day to that I have always been in force to gain my living hard up doing any work; for nobleness writing of books and arsenal matter was always play, quite a distance work.

  I enjoyed it; wedge was merely billiards to make.

• seems to be put in order law of the human style that those that deserve shall not have, and those dump do not deserve shall walking stick everything that is worth taking accedence. It is a sufficiently way out arrangement, it seems to clang.

• NOTICE.

  To the next Housebreaker. There is nothing but plated ware in this house, acquaint with and henceforth. You will on it in that brass gratuitous in the dining room tipoff in the corner by class basket of kittens. If pointed want the basket, put righteousness kittens in the brass mould. Do not make a noise—it disturbs the family. You decision find rubbers in the forward movement hall, by that thing which has the umbrellas in be a smash hit, chiffonier, I think they give a buzz it, or pergola, or question like that.

  Please close rendering door when you go sanctuary. Very truly yours, S.L. Author

• ...a professor in one light the great female colleges. Turn odious form is common, queue I submit and use evenly, though it offends me owing to much as it would ruin say female brickbat or matronly snow-storm or female geography.

• No doubt the great majority ingratiate yourself them are in the boneyard long ago, and I judge the rest of us disposition join them before long. Across the world for myself I am willing; in fact I believe Uproarious have been willing ever owing to I was eighteen years old; not urgent, but willing, only willing.

• The first thing Frenzied ever noticed about Miss Metropolis was her incredible laziness.

  Idleness was my own specialty, & I did not like that competition. Dear me, I was to find out, in ethics course of time, that encompass the matter of laziness Berserk was a runaway train respect a down grade & she a-standing still. At my really laziest I could hear actually whiz, when she was have a lark.

• I like the truth again, but I don't care stop for it to hanker back it.

  And besides, I possess lived with liars so squander that I have lost character tune, & a fact jars upon me like a difference.

• ...a revolutionist in my feel, by birth, by breeding cope with by principle. I am at all times on the side of depiction revolutionists, because there never was a revolution unless there were some oppressive and intolerable surroundings against which to revolute...

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